Their eyes twinkle when they see me. I am aware of their
hearts leaping with a bittersweet ache, for here, my own heart reacts
similarly. All of a sudden, I forget that I am a woman, all grown-up. I go back
in time, becoming a little child all over again. I fly straight into my mom’s
arms, just like how I always did, when I came back from school. I embrace my
dad, just like how I used to do every evening, after he came back from work.
The tears which follow are inevitable. Only when I look at them now, do I
realize how much I miss them…
It jumps onto me and licks my face entirely, the moment it
catches my scent. Though it does not have a mouth as large as mine, I know its
heart is screaming noiselessly. The poor creature does not even understand why
I had to leave and tend to myself. All of a sudden, I forget the fact that I
had been away for so long. I play with it, allowing it to pull me and push me
as much as it likes. The tears which follow are inevitable. Only when I look at
it, do I realize how much I miss it…
They come in bustling, as noisy as always, and give me bear
hugs, rough and playful, just like how they used to be when we had lived
together under the same roof. All of a sudden, I forget that we don’t do it any
longer. I join them in the loud laughter, the ear-splitting music and awkward dancing,
without any restraint, without a shame. These are my siblings, who knew my most
embarrassing secrets. I am aware that their feelings and thoughts at this
moment are the same as mine. The tears which follow are inevitable. Only when I
look at them, do I realize how much I miss them…
My old room is just the way I had left it. It’s just that it
felt a little empty now, as all the stuff that I really cared for; I had
carried off it with me. Yet, the moment I step in, I feel as if the room has
come alive. All of a sudden, I forget that it is no more the room I used to
dance in, without a care in the world, without inhibitions. Automatically, my
feet move and I do a jig, just like how I used to do frequently. I still have
my privacy in this little hub of mine. The tears which follow are inevitable.
Only when I look at it now, do I realize how much I miss it…
They giggle and grin,
as always, when they look at me. We hug each other and tease each other. Someone
has her hair too short. Someone has grown a paunch. All of a sudden, I forget
that we hardly hang out these days. We relentlessly pull each other’s legs,
just like how we used to do, when we hung out, every day, without fail. These
are my friends, who had been with me, through thick and thin, crying over my
shoulder when they needed it and offering me their shoulder, when I needed it. For
now, here we are reminiscing past memories. The tears which follow are
inevitable. Only when I look at them, do I realize how much I miss them…