Little things make a huge difference in life... cherish them, live them, love them, enjoy them...live life to the fullest

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Going Back Home...



Their eyes twinkle when they see me. I am aware of their hearts leaping with a bittersweet ache, for here, my own heart reacts similarly. All of a sudden, I forget that I am a woman, all grown-up. I go back in time, becoming a little child all over again. I fly straight into my mom’s arms, just like how I always did, when I came back from school. I embrace my dad, just like how I used to do every evening, after he came back from work. The tears which follow are inevitable. Only when I look at them now, do I realize how much I miss them…

It jumps onto me and licks my face entirely, the moment it catches my scent. Though it does not have a mouth as large as mine, I know its heart is screaming noiselessly. The poor creature does not even understand why I had to leave and tend to myself. All of a sudden, I forget the fact that I had been away for so long. I play with it, allowing it to pull me and push me as much as it likes. The tears which follow are inevitable. Only when I look at it, do I realize how much I miss it…

They come in bustling, as noisy as always, and give me bear hugs, rough and playful, just like how they used to be when we had lived together under the same roof. All of a sudden, I forget that we don’t do it any longer. I join them in the loud laughter, the ear-splitting music and awkward dancing, without any restraint, without a shame. These are my siblings, who knew my most embarrassing secrets. I am aware that their feelings and thoughts at this moment are the same as mine. The tears which follow are inevitable. Only when I look at them, do I realize how much I miss them… 

My old room is just the way I had left it. It’s just that it felt a little empty now, as all the stuff that I really cared for; I had carried off it with me. Yet, the moment I step in, I feel as if the room has come alive. All of a sudden, I forget that it is no more the room I used to dance in, without a care in the world, without inhibitions. Automatically, my feet move and I do a jig, just like how I used to do frequently. I still have my privacy in this little hub of mine. The tears which follow are inevitable. Only when I look at it now, do I realize how much I miss it…

 They giggle and grin, as always, when they look at me. We hug each other and tease each other. Someone has her hair too short. Someone has grown a paunch. All of a sudden, I forget that we hardly hang out these days. We relentlessly pull each other’s legs, just like how we used to do, when we hung out, every day, without fail. These are my friends, who had been with me, through thick and thin, crying over my shoulder when they needed it and offering me their shoulder, when I needed it. For now, here we are reminiscing past memories. The tears which follow are inevitable. Only when I look at them, do I realize how much I miss them…   

Monday, June 4, 2012

Letting Go…



She lay on the bed, weak and cold
Spending her last few moments in this world
And I try to prolong the life of her frail failing body
Making futile attempts to find some kind of remedy

She looks at me, her eyes all moist and hollow
They are begging me, ‘It does not work. Just let go!’
Her eyes say it all, though she doesn’t make a sound
She is writhing and wheeling in a pain too great and profound

But I can’t just give her up, can’t let her leave so soon
I am rather much used to her presence and not ready to feel this alone
A voice in me whispers in warning, ‘You are being selfish,
Foolishly believing in some miracle, some obscure life-saving fetish’

Now when I look into her eyes again
I am alarmed, as in them, I find a fierce rain
Red as blood, they are full of fury and extreme hatred
That look that I always avoided and dreaded

‘Let me die,’ she commands with her eyes
Transfixing me with that gaze of hers, filled with malice
In that stare, I see a murderous rage that pain brings
That demand to be freed from all the agony and worldly ailings

I pause and fixing my gaze with hers, I take a step backward
Lost in thought and retrospection and also a little bit scared
Even on her death bed, she is still the keenest
She does not miss my twinging in the least

As she sees me now, I see her look soften
She comforts me, ‘It’s OK. These things happen
Anything which has a beginning, has an ending
And surviving with that absence is all a part of learning'

Warm tears scour down, giving up
Releasing and delivering me from all the meaningless hope
As her dark eyes close slowly forever
I etch her face permanently in my mind – a memory that would part with me never


In favor of the practice of Euthanasia - mercy killing... Sometimes, giving up hope helps put your loved ones out of pain!

Sunday, June 3, 2012

The Knight Vs The King...


Not at all different from a girl any other
A firm believer I am, of a cliche, 'The knight in a shining armor'
My eyes, when awake, search for him desperately
When closed, they dream of him endlessly

Of his probing eyes looking deep down into mine, I am aware
Of his cool fingers brushing off from my face, tendrils of hair
Of his warm breath breezing on my cheek, as he holds me close
Of his lips, as he whispers, 'You are as beautiful as a red rose'

How does one find such a man in this world, in reality?
Mind accepts defeat, but the heart rejects any offer of peace or tranquility
'I do' finally accept to belong to a man, but with a half of my heart
Readying myself to embark on a journey, to adapt and to adopt

When asked the dreaded question, 'Is he your knight?'
I wave my hand carelessly and say, 'May be he is, may be not'
'Is he like this? Is he like that?' the cruel questions persist
Raising a minor chaos in the poor heart, which has no one to assist

Days pass and slowly upon me dawns a realization
Reality is a lot different, yet differently more beautiful than any fascination
It may not be all romantic or enchanting or surreal
Yet, it surely is unique, toughening, and most importantly it is REAL

He may not be like the dreamy hero sweeping the heroine off her feet
He may not be all lovey-dovey, proclaiming loudly his love for me to the entire fleet
Yet, he is all that I did not know I actually wanted
As for me, I now try every living moment to be the one he truly warranted

He does not own a shining armor and he surely is not a knight
But, he is a king, my king, who boldly conquered and filled the whole of my heart!!!


Inspired from a real life situation of an anonymous friend...